It is a beautiful sunny day in Olympia. The first vestiges of spring are showing, but none of that concerns me right now. I am burdened with heavy pondering. What will come of us as a people? We live in strange times. It would seem that we are in a frantic race. Capitalism seems to be crumbling before our eyes. Are people getting wise? Have the masses become enlightened to the point where they’ve realized the futility of buying useless garbage? It would seem that way. And that means trouble for all of us. There are many many business that thrive on the manufacture and sale of absolute nonsense. They employ thousands, and if people stop buying their useless wares then they will go belly up leaving a tremendous gap in National Employment.

It is terrible indeed, but what choice do we have? Eventually people were going to figure out that they don’t need Hannah Montana costumes and little Santa Clause figurines. And now that it seems that they have all of the companies that have been riding a wave of dumbness and gullibility are starting to panic.

So what is the answer? Technology! That’s right. Robot receptionists and mind-reading helmets are just a drop in the bucket of what is soon to come. How long before we are able to download our consciousness directly into the ether of cyberspace? How long before robots and androids become self aware and start demanding basic rights? These questions and more are what is preoccupying my mind right now. Not the strange and new climate that seems to exist.

“When the going gets weird the weird turn pro.”

Hunter S. Thompson said that. It rings true now more than ever. And why not? What could be more weird than controlling a robot with thought alone while society collapses all around us? So let’s go pro. I am now offering my services, whatever they may be, to the highest bidder. I am on the auction block and willing to work. I have played enough video games to know that there are always jobs to be done and money to be made with a little self motivation and some good old fashioned American elbow grease.

So there it is people. I am for hire. You know how to contact me.


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